Goodbye October, you were kind of a hard month but probably still one of the best this year. It's gonna get harder from here on out too.
To-Do...
1. IN ORBIT CONT.
2. SNAIL MAIL
3. TF2 ANNIVERSARY
4. START SW5E CAMPAIGN
5. JOB SEARCH CONT.
6. FINISH KOTOR
7. HALLOWEEN COSTUME
Movies
I actually didn't watch a single new movie this month, it's so embarrassing. From all the rewatches I guess my favourite was either Trick or Treat, Ginger Snaps, or The Faculty. Or Paranorman. Anyway, I need to actually watch new movies!
TV
Twin Peaks I suppose! We haven't watched any other TV this month anyway but also very unlikely that anything can surpass Twin Peaks.
Games
Ah, the reason I barely read or watched anything this month: Dragon Age. Origins, to be exact. I'm actually still not done with the game, I'm about 40ish hours in and it's amazing. RIP to Bioware, who were axed this month by EA, the darkest stain on the gaming industry. I unfortunately am in love with Alistair so he was my first romance but I'm also so into Leliana. And Zevran. And Morrigan too, to be honest. Anyway, I'm gonna have to replay this and see everything that I missed.
Books
I'm gonna try and finish up the original four books from the Circle of Magic series. They are great and short. I've picked Daja's book back up so that's where I'm at.
Music
Listened to a bunch of stuff this month, mostly post-rock and DnB. But the highlight album has to be Crystal Method's Drive. It's so good and bouncy, but has one of my fave subdued melancholic electronic tracks too: Starting Line. Just pure fun.
Hey. Weird week. I haven't been paying attention and saw like two days after, sometime in the middle of the week, that EA shutdown Bioware. What the fuck. This was such a stupid time to finally get into Bioware. Like walking into a building burning down: "where's the party at?". No surprises though, EA is a piece of shit. They killed Bioware with Anthem, a game about exosuit-wearing cool guys flying around with guns... sounds vaguely familiar. Almost like there's another EA subsidiary that developed a beautiful sci-fi game about advanced humans in some very cool gear which are also piloting some mechs... anyway! What a stupid move to make a studio that writes amazing stories do a drab action-"RPG" live service open-world (yawn...). I remember when it was revealed at like, Summer Game fest of whenever the fuck I was thinking only one thing: can we have fucking Titanfall 3 instead? I'm guessing Respawn is gonna get axed at some point too. The Jedi series has been amazing and what people actually wanted but Apex is a fucking drain on the Titanfall universe. And apparently all the OGs left to form Gravity Well anyway.
All of that to say I picked a weird time to really get into Dragon Age. I've always liked KOTOR but Mass Effect kind of soured me on Bioware. Not that it's a bad series or anything, it just didn't click with me as much. Dragon Age rocks though. And I'm sure that when a millennia has passed and everyone starts missing human writing all these scumbags that don't understand what pronouns are will be like, man, Veilguard was actually so underrated... I don't think Veilguard is an amazing game but it got shit on for completely the wrong reasons.
So, Monday. Nothing much. In the evening we watched Ginger Snaps because Mo and Marta haven't seen it. And it's a teen girl classic.
On Tuesday I made a test-pizza that was actually a regular pizza. I'm planning to make pizzas for Halloween and I haven't made one in ages. It turned out pretty good but I should have definitely not been lazy and kneaded longer. That's where the trick is!
On Wednesday we played some more Deadlock with Mo, Rost, and Tom. I am genuinely so old I have no idea what's happening at all in this fucking game. I also don't like 3rd person shooters... The art style and characters are awesome though.
Thursday and Friday, I've been working on backing up all the posts from this blog on my site. I'm probably going to move over to blogging on my site only at the end of the year. I don't have any plans to delete this blog but honestly fuck Google. I'm sick of it to no end.
Nothing going on this weekend. I've actually been in a huge creative slump. Sort of. I've doodled some of the characters for my Ironsworn campaign which was going well but what I really want to work on is my comic but somehow the groove is fucked! The most important feature of a comic is actually making sure it's done which I am not even a little close...
No pictures at all this week. Sad. But it's because nothing's going on. And I'm sad.
This Week I'm Excited For...
Halloween and the 10th anniversary of Titanfall 2 that's coming at the end of next week. Much to be excited about actually!
Song Of The Week...
I listened to a lot of God Is An Astronaut this week, I usually in autumn and winter. I actually didn't give their most recent album much time in the past two years that it's been out. Not because it's bad, it's actually very good and has some incredibly cool musical motifs that you don't see in post-rock often (the zither, sitar, and a tanpura!). All the songs are really great, and long, and I have a bunch of favourites but I'm going to pick Apparition for this week.
Very unexpected stuff this week. Mostly a visitor who dropped in without warning. I don't know if this is my anti-social streak but one of my biggest pet-peeves is people showing up without warning. Even a message an hour or two ahead would have sufficed. I don't know... depends, I guess, because if we're deep in a friendship this rule no longer exists. Like, if Tom wants to show up whenever he totally can. But many other people... I guess I just appreciate a heads-up but maybe I'm being too picky. And also I lost many, many hours gaming this week. It's bad news for someone who already barely gets anything done.
On his throne.
On Monday I did a very serious room cleaning. I know I say I do that every week or two (as all people do, I would guess) but this one was serious. Things went into boxes and the like. Otherwise I did some more painterly art on the tablet to get a better grasp of it's unique features. Here's some simple thumbs I did for my SW5E PCs though, Jedi Master Kiyan Tansi and Jedi Padawan Maro Hari.
Kiyan.
Maro.
I made a grave mistake on Tuesday. So, last post I mentioned getting myself Dragon Age Origins on the 360 so that I'd have a Bioware game to play by myself when Mo didn't want to play KOTOR together. And he's played it before and he told me: wait, wait, wait... it's a very good game. I was, like, well, duh. Okay... but he insisted: it's a very, very, very good game. Whatever, man!
I need help...
I'm sorry to say it is indeed a very good game...I have lost hours... nay, days! In the short time I managed to do all the quests in Lothering and the Brecilian Forest I have become completely trapped within the world of Dragon Age... I sat down Tuesday evening for a short stint and before I knew it it was 4AM. My day, my sleep schedule, my life is ruined!
I guess this is my life now!
And don't get me started on the characters... I was going in 100% sure to be romancing Leliana. And I like her a lot. But unfortunately you meet Alistair first and he said funny things to me and it was over! Fucking Bioware does it again... they imbue polygons with incredibly moving personalities. Apparently there is a way to meta-game the fuck out of everything where you technically end up with both of them as your partners/lovers but I couldn't do the whole breaking up/reconciling to either of them. Especially Alistair, he wouldn't understand. Look at how stupid he is!
Don't mind the cursed gaming setup.
Earlier in the week my sister and her friend also went absolutely nuts with the Halloween decorations. She said she didn't want to do much and we ended up looking like Hot Topic. Nothing of note on Wednesday otherwise.
I bet you're terrified right now.
By the way, I've not mentioned this much on the blog but many may already know of the ongoing protests in France led by students. Obviously, I support completely (yeah, I don't give a fuck if they break windows or burn trash cans after how cops and their own faculty and the education boards treat them). My sister is in high school and has taken parts in walk-outs and honestly I should be participating as well and want to but there's issues... I'm not a French citizen, so participating is extra risky and also aid to talking points that conservatives are spreading that these protests are led by non-French people (total bullshit). I'm not gonna act like I'm doing the right thing, I am being kind of a pussy, but also I'm not just another European in France. I have an asylum seeker status and I do not want to lose it. The current centrist government is incredibly lax on upholding the law and human rights so I don't trust them to do right by anyone, especially non-French people. But if there's something I would say is that you should not fall for the smears the mainstream media is spreading about the students: they are highly organized and their demands are clear and incredibly reasonable.
I had a weird situation on Neocties on Thursday. A website that generates an exuberant amount of AI stuff followed me and was also apparently discussing me on their feed or something. Now, the recommended and my usual go to is block and move on. So I totally understand that I did not follow my own advice by doing the following but it just felt so, so egregious to me. Not only is it just AI slop but it was also NSFW and pornographic. I'm no puritan but AI porn is literally evil. It's the shit that makes CSAM and deepfake porn of real people, mostly women. AI generation is always so misogynistic in it's implementation, it really grosses me out. So instead of a block and ignore I left them a somewhat aggressive message to unfollow me. They whined on their feed that what they make is not slop which is total bullshit and delusion and that's where it ended. Not only is it slop, it's also not 'made' by anything: it's a recycling of existing works without permission. An offensively mediocre collage void of human thought, originality, or creativity. I'm not proud that I engaged with this, I really should have blocked and moved on, but it made me mad.
My mum and some family friends left on a small two-day vacation so it was just the kids at home! Ah, yes, the 27 and 24 year old kids... Sometimes I think I should have more shame than I do but I can't juggle irrational fear, stress, and obsession with all that too.
On Friday a friend we haven't seen in a while visited. She stayed over for the night and told me of her woes. She recently broke up (sort of?) with a guy who's kind of a stalker and majorly controlling, like he won't let her talk to her friends kind of stuff. So I obviously said: dump his ass, never talk to him again. And she said 'yeah' but kind of halfheartedly. Straight girls... what are you doing? The options cannot be that thin. You are better than this.
On Saturday we dropped by the local recyclerie and I found three super cute tops. More on that you know where... before we left I already started up Dragon Age so after a super fast there-and-back from the recyclerie I somehow spent basically another 7+ hours submerged. This is becoming a problem... I did finally romance Alistair and the romance scene was painfully awkward and demented, just perfect! Our pixel touched...! My feet kicking, me giggling! ...I'm 27, by the way.
Cat spheres.
On Sunday I sent out some more work applications. Also some kind of bizarre issue with France Travail that I need to solve. Did take some time for some important site stuff that I will likely reveal in the near future. Stay tuned.
This Week I'm Excited For...
Shamefully, to play way, way more Dragon Age Origins. And then I'm going to have to somehow physically restrain myself from playing Awakening or DA2 or Inquisition. I will have to put a stop to this!
Song Of The Week...
Crystal Method's Starting Line is probably my favourite of their songs but High Roller is a close second. Much grimier and dirtier, it's got a crunch. Very cool song and album!
All caught up with the blog, oh yeah! Unless something horrible happens between me starting this blog post and ending it. I sure hope not... Anyway, had a pretty good week. Tom came over nearly every day so we could "work" and "apply for jobs" and "be productive". Lots of Star Wars stuff happening in my life these days. We're so back.
Had a regular busy morning on Monday, just getting tasks done when Tom texted me if he could come over and work at our place. The juju wasn't going at his and he's doing his internship applications right now. I set us up on the dining table and we got everything prepped and ready to go only to just talk shit for like 4 hours. Literally no work done on day one. Ah, there's always tomorrow!
Tom came over again in the early afternoon on Tuesday and this time some work was done. 'Some' is doing much heavy lifting here. I love co-working but I think the problem with only two people co-working situations means you just start chatting and having too much of a good time. We needed more people to passive-aggressively shame us into working. I did hype him up for like 40 minutes to make some calls: one went well and the other didn't even bother picking up. A storm was expected and it started absolutely pouring just as he left so he got totally drenched. But survived!
On Wednesday, Mo didn't have classes and Marta came back from school early. I take back what I said about needing more people when co-working, you actually need more and a specific kind of people because the chaos got even worse. Earlier in the day I ran into the lady who runs the hotel that's kind of having it rough recently. She was actually one of the recruiters at the work expo thing in May. I did get accepted for a trial run there but it was 2-weeks of non-paying internship-style work before they even hire you. At the time this seemed like a pretty shit deal and I was also busy with farm work so I said no... may have to crawl back and beg for that possible job, I guess.
On Thursday my period started so me and Tom were by the couch this time. I played around on the DS, mostly trying to finish the first Apollo Justice game and Tom was doing some autumn sale shopping on Steam. When he left me and Mo kept playing KOTOR. God, this game is so good...
Heating pad.
On Friday I was still couch-ridden but I was busy moving some new games to the 360. Got Mo his Ace Combats and PGR4. Resident Evil 5 for Marta and Yolanta to co-op. And Dragon Age Origins and Prototype for myself, I haven't played the bio-terrorism in many years and I was kinda missing it. And since me and Mo are playing KOTOR together I wanted a Bioware game to play by myself when he's busy so I picked something he already played. Tom was playing the recomp of Twilight Princess the entire time, totally locked in.
Been debating whether I'm going to continue my original Starforged campaign or attempt a solo SW5E campaign this and next month. I got kind of stuck on the Starforged story because I was doing the world-building at the same time as the story so I was stumped often. However, the actual play of Starforged is great for someone who likes TTRPGs purely for the story stuff and uses the dice-rolling and stats as a mechanism to get out of a writing block. I know this may be blasphemous but the math of DnD is just so boring to me and I'm too stupid to understand it. However, I do really want to run a campaign set during the Clone Wars for myself (I made the characters but the world already exists) and the best option is the SW5E system. There's like basically no good actual plays for beginners to see the step-by-step rolls of the game though. Annoying. I'm just gonna play it my way, I guess.
On Saturday we spent a lot of time getting through KOTOR and we finally made it to Manaan. I do remember getting this far into the game but after that everything's fuzzy. In the evening a cover band was playing a bunch of 80s metal hits close to the center of town so we went to check it out. It was kind of empty at first but soon enough the crowd gathered and there was this middle-aged lady really fucking up the dance floor.
Local edgelords.
Sunday was uneventful, maybe a little stressful. You know when you get into bed and it's just you and the darkness and you realize that your life is falling apart? Mild stress.
So, for any journal and planner enthusiasts: here's my current set-up. I know, for someone who's anti-many-journals-at-a-time, that's a lot of journals! Well, most of those are not actually ones I carry with me and are purpose-specific. Actually most of them are not journals in the classic sense. So, from left to right:
For now.
1. Brown journal - my draftbook, basically a kind of common-place notebook where there is no order, no rhyme or reason, and no polish. If I have an idea or a question I just put it in there somewhere.
2. Pink diary - this is my 5-year diary. It has a small slot to write about my day for each day of the year which is my preferred way of keeping track of what the fuck happened in my life. Otherwise I forget.
3. Green planner - a weekly planner. I used to use this to plan project-related tasks but never finished the pages so I'm using this as my intermission planner until the end of December.
4. Purple notebook - this is my media log. I'm looking to get off Letterboxd which is my last online/digital media logger that I use. I've had enough.
Smudged!
5. Red notebook - my media recommendations book. Basically, if someone has rec'd me something or I found something I want to check out in some capacity, it goes here. I try to sort it out by category type too. There was a pretty neat video where I got the idea from, the creator uses it as an alternative to doom scrolling but for me it's more of a 'so I don't forget' type of thing. However, I do not write down YouTube videos because I don't care about YouTube.
Also, like most people who have seen bits and pieces of Galactic Racer this week, I've had Biddy Blas on the mind. I watched a few races from the story mode of the game and I've decided that I'm buying that shit on a sale. Scribdoon, bookie.
This Week I'm Excited For...
To start my Clone Wars era SW5E solo campaign... in an actual journal! The setting is just after the Battle of Geonosis, meaning the clones and the Jedi are only beginning to cooperatively work for the Republic. It will follow a Kage Padawan called Maro Hari who recently lost her master in a brutal encounter with a mysterious Sith and her new master, an aloof Oktarian called Kiyan Tansi.
Song Of The Week...
Been finding some new under-appreciated music and ran into Brookville and their song Walking On Moonlight, a pretty unknown early 2000s trip-hop-y kind of band a bit like Ivy or Air. To me, anyway. Just very nice instrumentals, with a few orchestral bits in there too.
I've got a few important things to get done this October, mostly projects, art stuff, and the endless search for employment. Also doing something fun, mostly RPG based: both solo journaling RPG and video game stuff!
