If You've Got A Best Friend, You Won't Even Notice Getting Older {Week 27}

I'm not crying, you're crying! Well, though I didn't cry, it was close. If it's not exactly obvious yet I've been re-obsessing with Nirvanna The Band The Show these days on the account of I finally saw the movie. It's fucking awesome. It's probably the best movie that's gonna come out in the 2020s! I had a swell time, even better that I watched it with my brother and sister. Now I'm just waiting to see what Alice thought about it. If you haven't seen it yet, go! Literally, fuck this blog, go watch the movie!

Had an otherwise mixed week. How much more exciting can it get?! Then crashed, as is mandatory because an endless high is impossible. More on this in the actual blog...

Week 27.

Monday was the day it actually happened. We finished up season 2 and went straight into the movie. Well, before that I had a meeting with my France Travail counselor, we talked about who called back from the job fair. The only person who contacted her was the owner of a hotel. I was under the impression that it was a one-month long trainee-ship that was paid, which is how it was pitched to me at the fair. Turns out it's unpaid. The hell! 

We had a pretty cool teacher at our uni, who also worked in the animation industry in Hungary. And he said if there's one lesson to learn from me, don't ever do unpaid work. Work is work, full stop. And I live by that shit like nothing else! Oh, you lazy socialist, you might say, why should you be paid if you're untrained and still learning? And here's thing, while I'm making money for the firm, the firm pays me and that's that. I don't care how menial or unimpressive a job I do, that's a job that someone else will be paid for so I expect the same. Anyway, I turned it down, even the counselor was like, it's kind of a shit deal. 

Finally made it to the post office to mail an important package. Then everyone was home and after completing season 2, we put the movie on. My god, man. I have a lot to say. So much. I don't even know where to start. It's a masterpiece. I guess I'll have to marinate and write about it some more in the end of the month blog. 

How I was feeling after the movie...

Tuesday was my sister's last day of middle school. Ever! She came back incredibly pleased for three reasons: 1. School's officially out. 2. She won first place for the Big Challenge at her school. 3. She passed the first stage of her application to her high school of choice.

So because it was officially her summer vacation we finally decided to hit up the Chinese buffet in the next town over. They were begging to go for ages. They were like, 'can't you pick to go on your birthday?' back in April. It was my birthday but I was actually supposed to pick where they wanted to go. Bastards. We decided Wednesday was as good a day as any. In fact, a perfect day. Her first day of summer vacation AND Canada day. Boom, two birds, fewer stones. 

Anyway, the Big Challenge is an English challenge/competition sort of thing that my sister has been winning consecutively for like 3 years now. She's actually very good at it, she placed top 3 in the region and 217th in the country (and obviously placed first in her school). And that's without studying at all. I was like, imagine what you could do if you like, read a book or something? You'd totally demolish those kids! A month ago she came up to me and was like: "Who's James Joyce and Arthur Miller? They were on the Big Challenge test and I though they were in a band, like the Beatles." Uh huh. Hit singles: The Crucible and Ulysses.

She then said to me: you could totally wipe the floor with those kids. And I was like, yeah I totally could. Those fifteen year olds don't stand a chance. I'd annihilate there. Too bad I don't go to her school. Or am 27.

On Wednesday we were dropped off at the buffet by a family friend who went off with our mum on their own errands. Because we are stupid and there weren't many people around we decided it was time for some filmmaking. Here's a masterclass in editing:

I'm actually so bad at editing it's not even funny. I installed OpenShot a few months ago to make a Halo: Reach AMV but still didn't finish it. Made this monstrosity instead. Happy Canada day! Here's my brother lurking (sneaking?) about the buffet. He looks so suspicious even when doing nothing.

Looks like he's spiking the soy sauce...

He's not. But he looks so shifty.

French version of Best Friend Rice.

Afterwards we dropped by Easycash, the pawn shop-style place where we got our Xbox. I didn't find much but my sister picked up some really awful DVDs. The CD selection was atrocious. We also went to a recyclerie where I found a few cute knick knacks. Also, Artfight has officially started! I did an attack on day 1 which is kind of cool. Cuz usually I suck.

Cute little set-up.

Way back.

Thursday is kind of a cool day because it's the official half-way point of the year. Congrats, you've survived 50% of 2026! It feels like no time at all has passed. Seriously, time is running past me and it's freaking me out. Bad news is it's getting warmer again. 

Friday, work and then dying. Also got chewed out for the most random shit by the family, mostly my sister and my mum. My sister has a new friend who's apparently in the know of the local lesbian scene (I didn't even know we had one! It's like having a gay scene in Random Shithole, Ohio, population 100. As far as I was concerned me and Tom were the gay scene). This was told to me with some kind of hinting look, like, hey maybe you should leave the house or something. I don't talk about this much (or maybe I do?) but I'm bisexual in a very nuanced, never-before-seen way: guys, while they are hot and cute are fundamentally undateable, but women (and enbies) are perfect in every way. If I had to ask someone out, it would likely be a girl. But I don't wanna! I'm in a really undateable time in my life myself.

However, my sister probably watched too many movies or something and assumes that I need to be a cool older sibling that just mysteriously has a girlfriend. How does this help her life? Who knows! I got bashed for being single and for not even trying by my own family who didn't give a shit about my dating life for like 10 years! What gives, man?! Anyone else have this much of an interrogation in their own home, unprompted and undeserved?

On Saturday, I had a sudden... like a kind of huge dip in everything. I just, sort of sat there and thought for a very long time about what the fuck I'm doing. Like in general. What is my life? I feel so overwhelmed. Which is kind of stupid because most people have way more than me going on and they handle it... better. I don't know if it was all the ambient, ethereal, trance music that I've been listening to or what, but the tiniest ray of clarity pierced the morbid atmosphere I've been curating for myself. Just decided I needed to make something. Really make something, something I've been promising to make for ages.

I'm going to quit a bunch of creative tasks I've planned for now. I was really excited to do Blaugust and to do a lot for Artfight but I don't think I've got the dog in me. Really, as soon as I decided... okay, I'll just not do it this year, I felt better. No crazy blog projects for now, no massive site updates yet. Just going to do one thing... my comic.

Finally, I'm gonna do my stupid comic! I've only been re-writing the same script for like 3 years. I'm still looking to do collaborative projects though, like the zine me and Alice are making. But for all my solo work, I'm pausing all of it just to do my comic.  

Big day on Sunday. Tom came over earlier, for lunch, because we went to his house at 3PM last time and straight up fell asleep. Embarrassing. See now that we get to work at 7AM or earlier, our sleep schedule is no longer fucked up. Which is bad. Anyway, I made chicken wraps, everyone seemed to enjoy them well enough. We played a bunch of Most Wanted and Tom didn't appreciate the designs of my Eclipse and Supra but he was wrong. We also fucked around in Black Ops 2 and Tom went home at around 5PM, because he still has uni on Monday.

We went to a friend's house for a BBQ dinner later in the night. Their kid and me are childhood friends, like probably since I was 6 or 7 and he was 7 or 8. I don't see my childhood friends that often these days because we all live nearly continents apart so it's kind of weird to see them again after so long. He's also in a job-searching nightmare. Dinner was amazing, we shot the shit (I managed to find a way to recommend NTBTSTM, barely-any-sequitur style, I've been doing that with everyone all week... I think people hate me). And then the day was over and I was exhausted, all nice and not tucked in (fucking hot in here!). And so, the week came to an end.

The end!

Isn't it great that the blog's almost on time? I've actually caught up! Me and you will soon be on the same timeline (unless you're from the future, I don't have any Orbitz, sorry). Blog's gonna go on as usual in this creatively weird time for me so stay tuned.

This Week I'm Excited For...

Not much. Maybe starting a little kiwi work up again, which would be nice. Not really. Why am I lying? It's gonna be 40+ and I'm gonna be in a field, with practically no shade, no bathroom, and no water re-fills, and a boss who deducts lunch from the work day. It's gonna suck. I am actually excited for my sister to hear back from her high school of choice. If we don't get a call by Monday, she's not in but if we do she is and that's amazing! Wish her luck for me, alright?

Song Of The Week... 

We were watching episode 6 of season 2, The Band List when the Hackers song started playing. Everyone is like, damn this is such a great song! Can't believe its from Hackers. I like it's camp but in reality I think Matthew Lillard is the only true redeeming quality of that movie. And this song obviously, which is amazing. It's been stuck in my head. I'm now on more 90s trance and ambient music than ever! I'm starting to leave the mortal plain...

Nirvanna The Band The Show The Movie The Weekend {Week 26}

Probably the longest title I've had on the blog so far. I'm sure it will get worse. I'm gonna start making Fall Out Boy songs happen over here! But yes, if you can't tell yet... I have literally one plan, a plan to rule them all, and that's watching some Nirvanna The Band The Show The Movie this weekend. It's happening, fuck it! 

Otherwise some job search stuff, some soul search stuff. Mostly a lot of being a downer. You ever look at the style of this blog, how cute I've bedazzled the place and go 'woah, the wholesome wallpaper is totally not matching this much profanity, banality, and gloom hidden behind all the furniture!'. I like to keep you on your toes. 

Week 26.

Monday, I was an idiot. This time in a very new and fresh way. You know that worry you have that you'll do something stupid, but you're like, it's so stupid, there's no way I'll actually do it. Well... my fear was always that I'd show up to a meeting but somehow get the place wrong. And guess what.

Yeah, I showed up to the wrong TOWN for my meeting with my France Travail counselor. That shit is so embarrassing. The fellas working the office in this town looked at me like, 'oh, poor you'. I think I would have felt better if they literally pointed a finger, laughed, called me a moron. Fortunately, meeting rescheduled but Jesus Christ. Took the bus for free though. Their machine was broken and whenever the passengers tried to pay the driver he'd wave them on, annoyed, saying, 'shit's free today!'. Awesome.

After class, Mo invited his friend Abde to Monique's pool along with the rest of us. My mum's friend was there too and so were Monique's niece and her boyfriend. Kind of a party! Turns out Abde is also a huge cinephile. Obviously, I asked what he likes, what he's seen recently. He was like, you know Scent Of A Woman? I was like, boy, do I! With Al Pacino! And he was like, yeah, he's amazing!

Mo got mildly annoyed that I was now the one hanging out with his new friend and tried to derail the conversation with his classic Danny Boyle propaganda. Have you seen Sunshine, though? What about Sunshine? It was already too late, Al Pacino was the star of the conversation. 

On Tuesday I was mostly busy preparing docs for my meeting on Wednesday with an interim organization. Something screwy also happened with Aurora on the Xbox that I couldn't fix so I left it to do the next day.

Wednesday morning my mum's friend's daughter Naomi dropped by because she went to see the dentist and was gonna wait for her mum at ours. We picked up some stuff at the bakery and I made ice coffees. I am making like three cups a day for myself. I need to be stopped. Anyway, she was doing her own thing and I did a whole fresh re-installation of BadUpdate to the USB and all is back to normal but Title Updates are still fucked. She also told me about how she drives and now I feel totally secure about my own absurd levels of cautiousness considering it seems they'll just let whoever the fuck get a license.

Went to my meeting at about 11. Nice lady, she took all my docs and then I explained my situation to her. It's a special kind of organization that works with foreigners and helps with integration, work, housing, etc. Also helps addicts and other varied difficult cases. 

For some reason, you know, despite the evidence, I've never thought of myself as a difficult case. I have literally no legs to stand on: endless school meetings about under performance, poor behavior, too confrontational and too much talking back, grades so bad they should have invented a negative-numbers scale just for me etc. Sporadic employment. And you know, that's without all the personal problems.

I guess I used to have a shame about it. Like, a real difficult case is someone who's totally out of control, and that's not me. It can't be me. But... I don't know, it probably always was. Is. In all areas of my life, not just work. Whenever I was still social, I was too much, kinda overbearing. And when I wasn't, it was like a 180: totally cold, if not hostile. I think I comforted myself by knowing there's someone worse than me. That's a stupid thought.

Now, I'm making peace with it, I guess. Yeah, I'm one of those people that struggles to do basic shit like find a job. I also feel like the world moved on without me, like I don't even know how to find a job anymore. 2021, the year I started my last full-time job, was only like 5 years ago but I feel like nothing is the same. And I was fired from that job by the way. FIRED. It was a shitty job.

So, either I'm embarrassed, full stop or I'm embarrassed and I move on. We'll see... either way, it better humble me. Don't usually think I'm above anyone else but when I feel really insecure I still think: at least I'm not addicted to drugs or something, as if that's a choice. It's rarely a choice. It's kinda dumb, right? To avoid judgement, I do the judging. Oh man, free me from this man-made hell, dude!

Uneventful Thursday and Friday, besides that we finally decided that we are going to watch all the Nirvanna The Band The Show stuff and then the movie. You know how annoying it is when something you should totally see in cinemas is not being screened anywhere near you? 

On Saturday we managed to get through just about half of season 1 only. This pace is not looking good right now. Finished it on Sunday, but the movie was inevitably postponed to Monday... so this whole thing, it's a lie! But Nirvanna The Band The Show The Movie The Weekend and Monday doesn't really roll off the tongue... unlike whatever the fuck I ended up calling this blog post. 

That's uh...

'What flavour is that?' is like a sleeper cell phrase at our house. Anytime someone asks that, about like a pizza or an ice cream or whatever me and Mo look at each other, slowly saying 'that's, uh... good and plenty'. It never makes sense and no one ever knows what the fuck is going on but so be it.

It finally rained. I mean, not just rained, it was biblical! My sister and her friend went to the big parking lot outside our supermarket and took some great pics. Wish I knew how to take pics this good.

Absolute cinema.

Not a total success but it could be worse. Artfight is on the horizon too. Much to think about...

The end!

Yep, that's it. That's the week. It's over now.

This Week I'm Excited For...

Er... to actually watch the movie this whole weekend was dedicated to. Like, what are all these plans that never happen! Kind of in the spirit of things, I guess.

Song Of The Week... 

This is a selection from the incredibly underrated video game, Blur. It's Bump by Spank Rock, specifically the Best Fwends remix. Makes me feel very cool when I'm walking down the street probably looking weird as hell. 

You're Now Leaving Bright Falls. Come Back Soon! {Week 25}

Hello there. It's your least favourite blogger, always late, still somehow crawling over the finish line anyway. 

Pool season is creeping upon us, should be here already but for some reason our stupid city doesn't want to hire lifeguards and is looking to save cash by only getting them here in July and August. Come on, man, this heat is apparently killing people! No really, some kids tried to swim in the river last week and died. Impeccable timing on that penny-saving plan, eh? I hate it here.

Week 25.

Monday, had a meeting with my social worker that went kind of bad because I forgot to bring a bunch of documents that were needed to schedule my driving test. I forgot to mention this in my last post but I was actually kind of sick over the weekend. Yes, in the 40+ degree heat. Ate too much ice or something. So my throat was totally fucked, headache, and I was trudging places at slug-speeds. She was too nice about me basically wasting her time, but we did look over some other stuff. At home, I uploaded some new art to my Artfight character profiles. Specifically some new stuff I did for Kevin and Julian. My god, I'm so bad. Whatever, we're doing this!

Tuesday I was becoming that skin person from Doctor Who who needs constant refreshing, also I was laid out like a puddle instead.

Work was alright on Wednesday, half day because of the heat. It literally feels like a thousand hot pins every time your skin's got sun on it. And if you're under layers, you're basically being slowly steamed in your own sweat. We helped Noel cut a tree down, so that was kind of fun except for when my brother was having like a heatstroke or something and just totally stood looking at nothing as a massive branch was about to come down on him. For a second, I was like 'damn, that's too bad, he was a pretty good sibling...' because I couldn't fathom making any quick movements in these temps. But then mum would probably be pissed so I floundered forward and got a hold of the back of his shirt just in time to yank him out of the way.

We haven't been watching FIFA much. It kind of lost it's magic to me (genocide denial and corruption will do that to ya!). It's just not Waka Waka anymore, which was kind of the last time I was really excited about the World Cup. Probably because it was the first one I was old enough to pay attention to.

On Thursday I was considering rain dances, prayers, and incantations.

He's all eyeballs.

On Friday I bedazzled my Artfight page a little. Put some of the bluest icons I could find, which wasn't many so I gave up and just started putting up whatever I liked, because I finally settled on team Tragedy. There's no happiness in this world so live with it.

Ta-da!

More importantly, we finally finished the first Alan Wake game. We first played it as a joke because of the hilarious writing and honestly it stayed pretty laughable for most of the game but... shit, I kind fuck with Alan Wake now!

Cursed screenshot. Actually crashed the 360.

On Saturday we went to the recyclerie with my mum and sister. Some really good stuff, especially for the summer. I'm happy with it.

A good time!

Then on Sunday, Monique invited us to the pool. We spent a couple of hours there, finally felt like I was actually alive no matter the chlorine levels. 

My weirdest delusion is that Uno can be won through skill.

Apparently my hair looked nice!

Trusty bag.

Finally styling this tube top.

Our town was also celebrating music day, the whole main street was blocked off and we spent most of it listening to this incredibly skilled jazz band. Not many folks were checking them out for some reason but us. They even came over and gave us a CD after their show! There were also square dancers in cowboy hats. Yes, in the south of France. I used to think we were kind of the Ohio of France but maybe we're like... the Alabama or Georgia of France. Which is so much worse.

There they go. Honky tonk. Fucking whatever.

Free CD!

Kept up with the pre-Artfight prompts bingo a bit too. Even made a little tragedy sticker that I used all over it. And obviously my user card. 

User card.

Free sticker. Whoever wants it.

1 bingo!

1. Fill out some hitlists: I filled out two hitlits, one of an Artfight mutual and another of a 32bit cafe forum-friend.

2. Fill out your team card and share: sure did, and posted it to my Neocities and on the 32bit forum thread.

3. Set yourself goals for AF2026: Done. The goals? None. Just do something. 

4. Update OC connections: this is a new feature and I used and abused it, especially for my mermaid characters.

5. Follow people you hope to attack: followed a bunch of people from 32bit as well as some Neocities friends.

6. Set up and post your own hitlist: I've never made a hitlist before so I decided to try it out. Scared.

7. Free square!

8. Join a team: team Tragedy, let's lose in a very morbid way!

9. Decorate your profile with HTML: As can be seen above, done.

10. Create an attack planner: I've made a bookmarks folder for all the characters I'm hoping to attack.

11. Welcome some new Artfight users in: Dropped a hello on the profile of a fellow Neocities artist who's doing AF for the first time this year!

12. Organize your bookmarks: Done.

13. Add a quote or lyric that represents your OC to their profile: all my mermaid characters have playlists of their own so I'm gonna count this. 

It will be the end of June soon enough. That's crazy. Though if it gets colder, fuck it, hurry up! 

This Week I'm Excited For...

Next week is the unofficial Nirvanna The Band The Show The Movie The Weekend. I'm forcing my brother to re-watch the web series, the show, and at the end we're gonna finally watch the movie. I am so done waiting, man! Sister may join too.

Song Of The Week... 

As you can probably tell all I have on the mind is NTBTS, and that makes it's way into the song of the week selection this time around too. I could have sworn that the chorus of Turnstile's Holiday was really similar to the chorus of another song I knew. If you know of a hardcore song that has the same rhythm and melody of Holiday's chorus (but not the rest of the song), please send it to me. This shit has been killing me! Anyway, amazing hardcore song. Or is it post? Fuck it, it slaps. Just plain good.

Help Me, Obi-Wan Kenobi {Week 24}

Hey. What's up. I'm fucking dying from the heatwave. We're all gonna die actually. The last throes of a planet that's gonna go under before we know it...

Er, on a less depressing note, we were watching a lot of Star Wars, and will be watching more soon, I guess. I totally forced my sister to watch Star Wars when she was tiny but it obviously melted away the way many childhood memories do. Luckily she does wanna see what all the hype is about presently. That's kinda fun, the passing of wisdom and nerd bullshit to a younger sibling. Though she rec'd me a song this week that she discovered on her own too. They grow up so fast...

Week 24.

Busy Monday. Next week the crew that's gonna insulate our roof will be coming in so we moved everything down from the third floor. Came up there normal, left sweaty and dehydrated. Saline in nature. Like, it straight up smells like a nice wooden Finnish sauna up there. Nice, if it wasn't the middle of fucking June. 

On Tuesday I went to the dentist, she adjusted the fillings so there's no gap anymore. Finally! Otherwise my sister was suddenly in the mood to watch Star Wars, so we obviously started with the prequels. Not gonna lie we skipped Phantom Menace this time because I kind of think it's a piece of shit. Except the fight with Maul. Should have been that for like 2 hours. They made me dye the pesto blue so that it looked Star Wars-y, if it bothers you, don't worry, it bothers me too.

Kind of scary, but they were pleased.

On Wednesday another agent came by, this guy was an energy savings expert and gave us two free caddies. Apparently leaving them on even if whatever's plugged into them isn't running is still bad and wasteful. So if you like me forget to turn the button off on the thing, try not to, I guess! He was also concerned about our fridge that's growing an ice-entity on the back wall, apparently a new government-sanctioned fridge is also a possibility. Fingers crossed.

Cryptid 1.

Cryptid 2.

Had a big day on Thursday, because I went to a local job fair. It was quite small, my brother and his class were also invited and I met his new friend, Abde. I talked to everyone, seemingly made an alright impression but I guess we'll see what comes from that. I think the face-to-face stuff is better, no algorithm to sieve you out in half a second, but it's no guarantee either. At least I can make them feel guilty for rejecting such an outstanding candidate as myself. Just kidding, they will totally dodge a bullet by not calling me back but they don't know that...

Insert cartoonish snoring.

Honestly can't remember Friday, I think it was so hot my brain actually boiled the memories out. Steam through my ears! Work days have been cut short too, cuz you can maybe work between 7 and 11 before the 40+ degree temps come out. Man, fuck that. We need to start killing billionaires right now. First, data centers, then private jets, and let's get some military bases too.

I'm afraid it's all cat photos this week.

On Saturday we had to stay downstairs pretty much all day. Everyone's been sleeping on the first floor recently, with pillows and mattresses. Like a disgusting sleepover where no one's having any fun.

Why he sit SO stupid?!

Spent some time on Sunday sorting out my Artfight page. At around 8PM the teams was revealed: Tragedy, Comedy, and Mystery. Yeah, a whole trio! That's pretty cool. As usual my first reaction to the teams was mixed but in like an hour I was onboard. I'm having a hard time picking a team though... I guess I have until July.

The end!

And that's it for the week. I got soooo much catching up to do it's unreal! 

This Week I'm Excited For...

To pick my Artfight team! I'm gonna sleep on it. I'm leaning towards Tragedy. I thought my second pick would be Mystery, but I'm actually feeling Comedy more. Alright, I'll make up my mind later.

Song Of The Week... 

So I didn't finish listening to the entire album... for some reason, but I've been enjoying MJ Lenderman's Boat Songs so far. Can't recall exactly how I found him but all I knew was that this was something great and in the spirit of Jason Molina. Turns out MJ himself credits Molina as one of his early influences. Shocker! There's a bunch of songs I liked but I think I'm picking Toontown for this week.